Regrets and Yearning

If I had just one more chance, I would do my life all over again. I would have made different decisions. I would have taken different paths. I would be a different person today. I would have dared to be different. I wouldn't have let the approval of others be the main influence behind my decisions. I would have dared to be me, to be true to myself, to express the real me. I would have worried less and done more. I would have the courage to do the things that are close to my heart. The courage to express myself through words. Through writing. Through travel. The courage to leave everything behind and explore the world on my own terms. See countries through the eyes of the folk who live there, to write about them and their stories. Meet people who are truly inspiring and are daring enough to be as eccentric as they want to be. I wonder is there more to my life than just this this mediocre existence, the humdrum of this dreary daily monotone where I wake up to the same things and tasks everyday. Where is the excitement, the great adventure that life has to offer? Why is it that when I look at the road that lead towards the future, nothing changes. Everything is as monotonous as it is now and everything seems dark and filled with obstacles. I wish God had made me a bird so I could just fly away whenever I wanted, to whichever part of the world I wanted to.